Rolling in my Benzo

· 546 words · 3 minute read

Lots of rap lyrics talk about benzos. Mercedes benzos. Nice cars. Just rented my second one from the Hertz in downtown Linz. A triple upgrade from the Ford Fiesta, but no rate change. Just €32 a day. That’s how we roll. I rolled it all the way home.

We rent cars to transport things we can’t carry, and to get out of town. Driving around is pretty easy. The signs are a little different of course — and there are no yellow lines — only white. But there is a special surprise inside. The radio. The stations are awesome. Last weekend we listened to some German Bing Crosby-like songs — the best was a call and response song between a married couple — or at least that’s what it sounded like to me. There is also plenty of classical music.

My favorite stations are the eclectic ones.

Ever wonder if a series of songs has been played, in the same order, sometime in human history? Billy Wilkins, some kid in Cincinnati, played Led Zeppelin’s Kashmir followed by Rush’s Tom Sawyer, in his bedroom, in the fall of 1985. If you ever hear those songs, in the same sequence, it’s not unique. Billy heard it first — about thirty years ago.

But here, in Linz, in my benzo, I am hearing unique sequences, one after the other. The disk jockey is outdoing himself. You thought yesterday’s selection was eclectic? Ha. Time to blow your mind.

Here’s the sequence that played on 95.2 FM [0] as I drove back home. The first song, Key Largo by Bertie Higgins [1], should not be confused with the Beach Boys Cocomo song. You’d recognise the lyric, “we had it all… just like Bogey and Bacall.” It’s a great song.

Next up was a song in Spanish, which I had never heard before, called the Ketchup Song [2]. The repeated riff sounds like You’re the One that I Want, from Grease [3] — so when it started playing I thought it was a remake. But it’s not. It’s the Ketchup Song. Maybe it’s actually about Ketchup.

The next song was by Nena, the German singer known for 99 luftballons [4], but it was NOT that song. It was some other Nena song. Apparently she made other songs, and people listen to them. I wish I could tell you what this song was, but I don’t want to waste my time searching for it. It was catchy, though. I hope Nena is alive and well, with the same haircut, somewhere romantic.

Nena’s track was followed by Kool and the Gang. The song was Cherish [5], and it’s been in my head all morning. It’s the kind of song you want to sing with a friend, on stage, drunk, at the Karaoke bar. Everyone at the bar grimaces when they hear it, but eventually they are singing it too.

The last song seals the deal as the most eclectic series of songs that has ever been played on the radio — at least for the next 24 hours. Eddie Rabbit. Rocky Mountain Music [6]. I do see some similarities between Eddie and Nena’s haircuts, but that’s about it.

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